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Everything's Broken

from The Derelict Craft by Schaffer the Darklord

/

lyrics

Well I got four flat tires, and the windshield is cracked

And then the power steering's out, alignment's all out of whack

A bunch of holes in the floorboard, chassis's all rusted

All the headlights, tail lights, brake lights busted

Plus upholstery is mostly burned and patched up with tape

It's all bloody, and somebody cut the lines to the brakes

And though the clutch won't catch, and the trunk won't latch, you know

It's still got a full tank of gas, so - even though

[CHORUS]

Everything is broken, none of it is working

All of it is riddled with dilemmas that'll worsen

If I don't get cracking at it, put it back together, that'll

Be the last straw on this camel's back, crack-a-lack-a
Everything is broken, none of it'll start
All of it is faulty, and it's falling apart

And it's fast approaching doom, and it's past the point of ruin

But I'ma keep it moving, I'ma keep it, keep it moving, I'ma do it



Well I got four crumbled walls, and the front door is gone

And then the sewer line has backed up and flooded the lawn

I got rats in the basement, bats in the attic

Mold in the kitchen and the bath so bad they're blackened

And a bunch of water damage everywhere from the leaks

And all the windows are shattered and covered up with tattered sheets

It's veiled from the sun, and the mail never comes

But the heat’s still on, and it runs, so - even though

[CHORUS]

Well I got four broken limbs, and my back is a mess

I got poison in my veins and a pain in my chest

Severely dehydrated from my sleep deprivation

My eyesight is rapidly deteriorating

And all my teeth in need of fillings, and my fingernails cracked

And I'm afflicted with incessant indigestion and a rash

My hair is falling out, and I can barely hear a sound, you know

I've still got ideas and a mouth, so - here we go

[CHORUS]

credits

from The Derelict Craft, released July 22, 2022
Untested Methods - instrumental
Madame X - voice of "B.E.T.H."
Mark Schaffer - lyrics, vocals, sfx, arrangement

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Schaffer the Darklord

Schaffer the Darklord (or STD) is a New York City-based rapper and comedian with material best-suited for brainy and/or drug- addled audiences. With manic energy, verbose vocabulary and cartoonishly commanding stage presence, STD skewers such topics as hedonistic substance abuse, sexual compulsion, urban anxiety and obsessive cat-enthusiasts. ... more

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