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The Department of Darkness

by The Department of Darkness

supported by
Jessica Evans aka PokeMC Sapphire
Jessica Evans aka PokeMC Sapphire thumbnail
Jessica Evans aka PokeMC Sapphire This entire album really is great, the relatable topic of hatred for the worst of humankind and expertly crafted songs make this a must have for anyone who has uttered the phrase "I hate people." And let's face it, most, if not all of us have. Touching on the simply annoying to the extremely evil acts of our fellow sapiens, with bomb beats and catchy hooks you cant stop playing, its worth every penny spent! Favorite track: Witch Hunt (feat. Miss Eaves, LadyJ & Lex the Lexicon Artist).
Zaranell
Zaranell thumbnail
Zaranell The transition from "I Hate People" all the way to "Settle Down" encapsulates what makes the album work - it is a release that is angry about the injustices in our modern world, but still knows how to kick back and enjoy the good parts of life like there's no tomorrow. Favorite track: Settle Down (feat. Mega Ran).
nightshift2112
nightshift2112 thumbnail
nightshift2112 Some of Schaffers best! Some excellent collaberations! World On Fire is a can't miss!
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  • The Department of Darkness Deluxe Edition USB
    USB Flash Drive + Digital Album

    This credit card-sized USB drive contains the debut album from The Department of Darkness, plus instrumentals, acapellas, bonus tracks, photos, detailed album notes, video and more. 4GB drive measures 3.37" x 2.13" and 0.09" thick.

    Includes unlimited streaming of The Department of Darkness via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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1.
The Bringer 04:45
With the sun shining on me on a beautiful day And all the songbirds singing, y’all, I’m doing the same Yay, no stress, just collected a paycheck I slip a fresh TDK into the tape deck And make a breakneck left into traffic Breeze blowing through my hair, I’m feeling fantastic I still got some miles, still trucking all the while Like it’s ’94, I still fuck with Doggystyle So check it, I shift that shit into second I’m dropping needles the fastest like I’m setting a record, you get it? And get a sea of green lights, gliding clear through Vanilla-scented AF swinging from the rear view With my man Vince Vandal riding shotgun A crisp uniform? Damn right, I got one Brown hat, shirt, shorts, gold in the zipper It’s me, Schaffer TD, I’m here to deliver, fuckers I bring the party, I’m bringing the fear I bring you to the edge, I bring you to tears I bring it to the front, while you bring up the rear You know why? I’m the bringer, and I’m bringing it here I bring the sunshine, I’m bringing the rain I bring my A-game, I’m bringing the pain You bring it on yourself when you bring up my name Who am I? I’m the bringer, and I’m bringing it hey Ayo, Vince, bring that beat back I cup the mic when rappers ask me for feedback A couple times I’ve had them after delete tracks You want that? Fuck that, you motherfuckers need that I see you waiting for me any way the wind blows With your dirty faces pressed against your windows Going oh so excited and tingly Like it’s Christmas, asking “Mama, what did Satan bring me?” I get crazy, my judgment is hazy Drive my truck into your garden, fucking park in your daisies And peel out, pissing out the driver’s side, got mine Screaming “I don’t give a fuck!” squealing through a stop sign Four blown speakers all rocking Slayer And Vince is popping off shots into the air Your tracking says your packages Are on time showing small signs of damages, dipshits I bring you bad luck, I’m bringing you joy I bring the ruckus, fuck, I’m bringing the noise I bring my milkshake, it brings all the boys You know why? I’m the bringer, and I bring it, enjoy I bring you higher, I’m bringing the heat I bring the fire till you’re soaking in your seat I’ll bring the bars, Vince is bringing the beats Who am I? I’m the bringer, and I’m bringing it, sweet Up to code (I bring it) the bacon home (I bring it) To a head (I bring it) back from the dead (I bring it) Into question (I bring it) to your attention (I bring it) I got one drop left in this session, and I’ma fucking bring it I’m in Queens, heading west on the BQE I take Exit 29 onto Tillary Street Right on to Flatbush Ave, over the Manhattan Bridge Slight left on Canal, toward the West Side Highway Right on to Spring Street Rolling up to 353 You slowly open up, afraid, although in some way You fucking knew that this was coming for you one day The van is on its side and on fire on your grass lawn And Vince is puking up blood with no pants on And yeah, we’re drunk as hell, jackass, the time Has come for you to sign upon the trackpad and bye bye, dickhead I bring the party, I’m bringing the fear I bring you to the edge, I bring you to tears I bring it to the front, while you bring up the rear You know why? I’m the bringer, and I’m bringing it here I bring the sunshine, I’m bringing the rain I bring my A-game, I’m bringing the pain You bring it on yourself when you bring up my name Who am I? I’m the bringer, and I’m bringing it hey I bring you bad luck, I’m bringing you joy I bring the ruckus, fuck, I’m bringing the noise I bring my milkshake, it brings all the boys You know why? I’m the bringer, and I bring it, enjoy I bring you higher, I’m bringing the heat I bring the fire till you’re soaking in your seat I’ll bring the bars, Vince is bringing the beats Who am I? I’m the bringer, and I’m bringing it, sweet
2.
Yo, you got a problem? I got some, lots of ‘em Everywhere I look, I’m crawling with ‘em, rotten ones Bottom rung dwellers want a bare knuckle catfight They got skeletons and belt buckles, that’s right Here they come, bum bum hits the kick drum Wicked like the pictures, get your stun gun, dum dum I’m done, son, better boost up the pace They got me cruising through space, they got me losing my faith They got me right where they want me, and they’re coming in hot Gotta slip a little distance in, get under their shots I brought a bat to a cannon battle, run to the spot And hold up inside and pack up my pride and cry “mother of god!” Rocking a hate-based rage making it up to the top Feel like my eyeballs’ll burst, my eardrums gonna pop I got my talons out, calling like a bald eagle I got seven billion problems, and they’re all people I hate people, I hate people, they’re evil At their best, they’re bad, at their worst, they’re lethal Lost all hope, past the end of my rope I’m just a misanthrope, and I can’t cope, people I hate people, see, all people equally Just a plague upon a planet we inhabit needlessly It’s too late for me to wait for what the future brings I’ve seen the human beings ruin things Watch ‘em cheat and steal and turn a blind eye Watch the self-serving, back-stabbing, wolf criers lie Watch ‘em feed, turn their wants to needs, greed getting big Watch ‘em wallow in their sickness, filthy two-legged pigs Watch ‘em pass you on the right, park and take up two spaces Interrupt you when you when you’re speaking, making smug, vacant faces Cut you at the bar, plunking down not a bone And come to a dead stop on the stairs and then fuck around on their phones Back peddle hate speech like they were jesting only Block a sidewalk, walking four abreast slowly Push their way aboard and block the doors on the train Out with their hella giant umbrellas after the passing of rain You mouth-breathing, open-mouth-eating cretins spit and spray You manspreading, mansplaining pricks, put your dicks away You name-dropping, shade-tossing, never-been stars Oh god, delete this species, please start over on Mars I hate people, I hate people, they’re evil At their best, they’re bad, at their worst, they’re lethal Lost all hope, past the end of my rope I’m just a misanthrope, and I can’t cope, people I hate people, see, all people equally Just a plague upon a planet we inhabit needlessly It’s too late for me to wait for what the future brings I’ve seen the human beings ruin things All of the sexist and the racist and deluded White dudes who think that criticism equals persecution Fuck the All Lives Matter crowd, feed ‘em to the fishes With the sickening Christians calling their bigotry freedom of religion The pious with their bias-backing stats they cite as facts And the bros in feminist clothes who don’t get claps, then attack The sexual predators, circling sharks who depend Upon the support of the chickenshit rape apologists they call friends Like that pretentious artist fuck who fights that man is better And that no-talent hack who still bites the hands that fed her The guy who wanted me working for free and talked shit when I didn’t And all of the kids who say that I suck who’ve been in my scene for like minutes Those who have the power to resist, but wouldn’t dare And the child in the White House and those who put him there I’m over ‘em, fed up, I’m had enough of their stay And if you’re with me, put a hand up, now go the fuck away I hate people, I hate people, they’re evil At their best, they’re bad, at their worst, they’re lethal Lost all hope, past the end of my rope I’m just a misanthrope, and I can’t cope, people I hate people, see, all people equally Just a plague upon a planet we inhabit needlessly It’s too late for me to wait for what the future brings I’ve seen the human beings ruin things Now fuck off
3.
Feel that hard pop, pyrotechnics, hearts stop My name appears upon the Titantron in sharp font I hit the ramp, flex, vamp, rock my fight walk When my hand goes up, your mouths shut, mic drop I rock striking like a cobra in a boa Not the biggest guy, but I could cut a promo in a coma You want your program autographed? Got it I draw a middle finger on it, ball it up and toss it I see your stupid signs, I hear your stupid chants I never pay no mind to babyfaces’ sycophants I eat up that heat, feed me your boos and those hisses Go on, keep at it, y’all, and I’ll just keep on blowing you kisses The rafters shaking above me You say you love to hate me ‘cause you hate that you love me You see me as an easy over though you’re crashing to the bottom ‘Cause dog, I’m only half of your problem From backstage – to the cage – go to hell – in a cell Hit the ring – do our thing – at the sound – of the bell Got no entourage – got no advocate – and we got no patience He’s the muscles – I’m the mouth of this operation I write the checks – he’s the one who will cash ‘em While I’m always in his corner – cold causing distractions It’s two against you – dropping signatures in rhythm We walked in wearing belts – and we’re leaving here with ‘em Y’all better heed me when you see me coming down the ramp Give you heebies jeebies, leaving your singlet brown and damp You’ll piss ya pants when you get these hands, better back down I bring that Raw power when I’m layin’ the smackdown Both my fists ‘bout to have a date withcha face Make you regret you came to this disgrace of a place What’s this city called? Worst city of the year Let’s be real, we’d rather be in any city but here I don’t say things for the cheap pop I’m the type to hit you with a cheap shot. Hit you with that low blow But the ref won’t know, cause my partna distracting the referee Effortlessly with the mouth that he got Don’t need to talk in promos, I’m a beast display I’ll break ya legs, arms and neck and I’ll beat ya face Special maneuver that’ll prove that we the best in town Step inside this ring, and we gon take ya down From backstage – to the cage – go to hell – in a cell Hit the ring – do our thing – at the sound – of the bell Got no entourage – got no advocate – and we got no patience I’m the muscles – He’s the mouth of this operation He writes the checks – I’m the one who will cash ‘em While he’s always in my corner – cold causing distractions It’s two against you – dropping signatures in rhythm We walked in wearing belts – and we’re leaving here with ‘em I start the match much to your surprise Duck through the ropes a couple times, then I tag in the big guy It’s I, the man who always manages to damage I won’t leave you standing, you will feel my power when I’m slammin’ And even if you take me down, I'mma flair with rage You couldn't get a three count even if there were errors made Your partner gets a two-count cover which I barely save And pull you off the apron, kick you into the barricade If you run back in the ring, better expect I hit you Ya partner gets a clothesline, you gon get a big boot When I bring a chair into the fight, you get nervous Crack open a jabroni like “YOU DESERVE IT!” But he’s the legal man, his lethal hands administer Your demolition, laughing as he sets up his finisher My finisher? I'mma put my partner on my shoulders Powerslam him on you, pin you for the three count and it's over From backstage – to the cage – go to hell – in a cell Hit the ring – do our thing – at the sound – of the bell Got no entourage – got no advocate – and we got no patience I’m the muscles – I’m the mouth of this operation I write the checks – I’m the one who will cash ‘em While I’m always in his corner – cold causing distractions It’s two against you – dropping signatures in rhythm We walked in wearing belts – and we’re leaving here with ‘em
4.
I burned your house down when you weren’t around to scare, you Moved in with your parents so I burnt down theirs too To make it better for your backbiting I left a letter said I did it in your handwriting Before I made off with your cash and your jewels Covered your car in nazi stickers, drove it into a school And left it, hacked your cloud, found stuff I wasn’t meant to see Sent it to your boss, cold stole your identity I sent bombs threats and caused and international crisis I drained your savings and donated them to ISIS Selected all your drafts, clicked on the backspace I made and circulated pics of you in blackface The rumors spread through, just like I meant to Buddied up your friends too, turned them all against you But the worst crime was after the fact When you talked about it, why would you do that? You’re a bully, a bully bully Yeah, just like the ones that I had as a kid You fucking bully, a bully bully Because you told folks about the things I actually did You’re a bully, a bully bully Speaking out’s an evil even demons never would do You’re the bully, you’re just a dead-ass bully And now my reputation’s ruined, how could you? I’m here to tell it like it is now So haters don’t give me no lip now Your girlfriend hopping on my dick now We invisible, you can’t see my clique now I’m on the wing, you John Lithgow I found your journal and I ripped out A couple pages cause you bitched out I never did that shit, you snitch, wow Just because you thought I was a gentleman You stupid though, I’m all about the Benjamin Franklin, it’s time I gave you the spanking That you deserve, I’m swerving and you sank in Into a pit that I dug out in my basement You dead now, job looking for replacement Ay, I’m a good guy, why did you test me? I sink you in the lake like Nessie Body decomposing, now you messy Stop blowing horns, you not Gillespie Oh, boo, why did you have to say #metoo When it was you who chose to wear clothes that I could see through? Honestly, I didn’t mean to But you were gonna tell all what we’d been through Ooh, you could’ve been my queen too, boo But now we through, and it’s your loss, bye bye So, there’s three truths in every moment Yours, mine and the facts, and everybody knows it Yo, the one that favors me is the one that I’ve chosen And I own it, I guess my truth hurts, don’t it? No one notices through all my spin, your story remains I campaign for their hearts, pour poison in brains And maybe all my daily posts of it are overkill I’m Scut Farkas with a whole squad of Grover Dills Serving as the chorus in my theater of victimhood I wish you would’ve let it go, but watch the show, your ticket’s good And you’ve withstood the scrutiny and lies, and you have stayed true But once I’m done, nobody will believe you I’ll just claim that this is literally killing me And get away with it without accountability And any breakthroughs that receipts may prove I’ll double down crying “bully” like I’m crying “fake news” You’re a bully, a bully bully Yeah, just like the ones that I had as a kid You fucking bully, a bully bully Because you told folks about the things I actually did You’re a bully, a bully bully Speaking out’s an evil even demons never would do You’re the bully, you’re just a dead-ass bully And now my reputation’s ruined, how could you?
5.
O Death, won’t you spare me over for another year? Long time coming, long time running Fill my lungs with dust, and zombies shuffle away from him I guess have to face it, Death moves at his own pace, and He’s in my every sniffle and the aftertaste with chasers I carry two erasers for those that seek some placement A merchant on the street with networks of some displaced vagrants They greet me with such hatred, their love borders on tasteless A fiend pays you to kill them with the smiles upon their faces New age Rr. Robert, unlicensed practitioner More off-tempo percussion than deep space listener I have a lot to answer for, locked behind a heavy door But honestly these days I barely sleep upon this cold floor I know what is in store for one who samples his own wares I see the demon faces in the subways drawn in pairs I’m seldom unawares but sliding towards the ledge Won’t take many more steps to wind up slipping from the edge O Death Knock knock! I let myself in, it was not locked You're looking well, well, you're not, are you not shocked That even with your top docs and eleventh hour God talk That I would not arrive in time? C'mon, let's take a long walk We got a lot to talk about, get up, chop chop Said time's a-wasting, yeah the clock's a-racing, tick tock We got a boat to catch at the River Styx dock A funeral march mixed in with a little hip hop By now your life is flashing past you faster, faster Flipbook full of pictures of mistakes and questions which you never answered You see the darkness which envelops you grow near and deeper Be the wind, sun and the rain, baby, don't fear the reaper Reflect upon regrets, I bet there's some you might've missed I'm the ghost of Christmas future with your final gift So I will take your hand and listen to you screaming through it Or I can just extend a finger, and let you lean into it O Death But I ain't ready yet - It doesn't matter But I got time left - Look, the clock is shattered There's still fuel in the tank - Not on your life, son Not once I'm wielding my scythe like it’s a siphon But can't I flee from thee? – Well, many have made attempts Why now? Why me? – C’mon, you know no one's exempt Will it hurt? O merciful destroyer Will I suffer? - Brother, please, let's avoid the spoilers Time is finite, a million gears have rusted The hands are closing in and hold the straw for pills you're crushing It isn’t fair, changed direction just to push through Ran for many years only to wind-up back here with you What does that mean? You cast seeds upon the stones And dare to grimace now that they took root and what has grown, so What about my plans? Oh, your legacy is ash It’s time to see the truth, it’s always me behind the mask O Death
6.
Stand up – Everybody - Hands up - Everybody Freak out – Everybody - Scream, shout - Everybody Make noise – Everybody - Girls, boys - Everybody In the stands – Everybody - Heya, Ran - Heya, buddy Hands up, it’s a stick-up, now everybody get up And get the place lit up bout as quick as a hiccup The mic sounds nice, I’m loud and clear Ready to get down in here, what up, Schaffer? Hit you like it's Godzilla giving you high-fives I've rocked a lot of audiences, none of them this live Cranking up the volume knob and breaking it off You're like a big bunch of balloons, you're ready to pop Never to stop the perpetual motion Get lost in the rhythm till you feel like you’re floating With no coasting, lift your hands until you can’t chill Nobody’s standing still From the front of the stage to the back of the room Y'all a powder keg, short fuse, set to go boom Ease off the accelerator, pump that brake pedal down Easy does it, for Pete's sake and settle down In the back to the front of the stage We're leaving all bars rattled like beasts in a cage Put your fists down now, don't even make a little sound Slow your roll, take a break and settle down Everybody take a deep breath Settle down, you're looking like you're needing your rest Settle down, party people and tonight's other acts Settle down, maniacs, take a knee and relax Check in, let’s get a temperature taken Because the needle of the ohmygod-o-meter’s indicating That the levels of hype in here are critical, excitement is visible Visceral and growing unpredictable Ok, I think you took the first verse a little too literal You have now raised a ruckus that’s become quite formidable Which under most scenarios is totally permissible But I’ma need you guys to maybe bring it down a little though Now we know how you go and get so excited But also there’s chill here, we need y’all to find it Your heart rates are heightened, your pupils are wide Time to build a pillow fort and crawl up inside May I suggest breathing or getting some rest? Your energy is at eleven, are you under duress? Come down a couple notches and cool your jets And maybe act like you got some sense, relax From the front of the stage to the back of the room Y'all a powder keg, short fuse, set to go boom Ease off the accelerator, pump that brake pedal down Easy does it, for Pete's sake and settle down In the back to the front of the stage We're leaving all bars rattled like beasts in a cage Put your fists down now, don't even make a little sound Slow your roll, take a break and settle down Everybody take a deep breath Settle down, you're looking like you're needing your rest Settle down, party people and tonight's other acts Settle down, maniacs, take a knee and relax Stand down – Everybody - Hands down – Everybody No lights – Everybody - Night night – Everybody Quiet – Everybody - Silence – Everybody Sound, safe – Everybody - Ready, Schaff? - Ready, buddy! Came in like a swarm of bees, should’ve been a butterfly Brought along a banging beat, should’ve brought a lullaby Take a couple Klonopin or chloroform aroma Let’s play a game called “Pretend We’re in a Coma” Yo, for real, try sleepy time tea to calm you Every time we fall through we love to involve you We always appreciate you giving us love But if you don’t relax we might get kicked out the club Out of control with no choice, but soon the end will come Listen to the sound of my voice and watch the pendulum Your eyes are growing heavy, slip slow and deep Now just go to sleep, just go to sleep From the front of the stage to the back of the room Y'all a powder keg, short fuse, set to go boom Ease off the accelerator, pump that brake pedal down Easy does it, for Pete's sake and settle down In the back to the front of the stage We're leaving all bars rattled like beasts in a cage Put your fists down now, don't even make a little sound Slow your roll, take a break and settle down
7.
Your Honor, I represent a Mr. Thomas in this matter His tragedy could not be sadder He’s been the victim in every altercation From humiliating injury to injurious humiliation Assaults with kitchen implements and fire False imprisonments, bisection by piano wire My client’s tired, hopes a quick conclusion, Seeks a protection order and restitution Your Honor, if it pleases the court My client, Mr. Gerald, will defend and support His own innocence, providing ample proof that imparts The fact the plaintiff’s claims against him are an absolute farce Mr. Thomas is the one who’s been abusive and violent For seventy years, and now he tries to buy my client’s silence With a costly, embarrassing trial and quote “clear his name” But the truth will cloud his tall tales, and justice will rain, thank you Your Honor, my client is the victim in this Oh please, Your Honor, my client moves to dismiss Counselor, you think my client’s a fool? Go chase an ambulance! – Objection! - OVERRULED! Your Honor, my client’s suffered enough Your Honor, my client’s claims cannot be rebuffed Counselor, curious, where’d you go to school? Cooley Law? – Objection! – OVERRULED! Your Honor, we bring our client under oath He’s never been verbose, that’s how trauma goes But please, if you are able, Mr. Thomas, indicate If your seemingly mousy tormentor is with us today (point him out) Mr. Thomas, isn’t it true That in 1950, ‘vember 25th with a pool cue You beat my sleeping client, an act of unprovoked aggression? It was all caught on film, no further questions Your Honor, we call Mr. Gerald to the stand Tell us about the axes and cigars and the pans That Thomas used when switched from kitten to vicious I thank you for your bravery – your witness Mr. Gerald, have you no conscience at all? You triumphed whenever you met, or can’t you recall You left him beset by the plasters, in tractions The proof is in every lights camera action Your Honor, the plaintiff’s whole case is out of order Your Honor, the defendant has a mental disorder Counselor, why must you be so cruel? Has no one loved you? – Objection! – OVERRULED! Your Honor, his client’s history is checkered Your Honor, we ask that that be stricken from the record Counselor fix-it man, your client’s a tool Pussy! Rat! – Objection! - OVERRULED! Your Honor, we’ve presented the whole of our petition And here before the court without contrition This respondent sits Projected evidence of cruelty gave him giggle fits While my client’s despondentness Spoke to us all along, it fits The pattern of antagonist and innocent We rest, and trust justice is imminent Your Honor, as our evidence has proven My client’s suffered at the hands of an abusive Animal and as for the handful of events Of violence by my client: all self-defense And any other claims otherwise are simply lies I mean, I literally represent the little guy Given this, plus the plaintiff’s behavior We are certain that today the court will rule in our favor (thank you) Your Honor, my client is the victim in this Oh please, your Honor, my client moves to dismiss Counselor, you think my client’s a fool? Go chase an ambulance! – Objection! - OVERRULED! Your Honor, my client’s suffered enough Your Honor, my client’s claims cannot be rebuffed Counselor, curious, where’d you go to school? DeVry Law? – Objection! – OVERRULED!
8.
Joe was the top guy on a Man Show A comic on the radio, a boatload of fan bros Listened for opinions they could pick up When he said that PC culture’s on a witch hunt Bitch, what? Aww #Metoo’s got you blue? Lay down as the woman I'm gonna cater to you Your wood is important. Relax: decompress As I tie you up as a place this giant board on your chest This weight on my shoulders? Can you handle it? Let it all fall down cause I wanna keep you grounded. All my heavy shit press down on your vital organs This weight cracks your bones til you scream “No more man” Good boy! I see your tongue wag And your eyes bug out. You’re breathless Goodnight baby. And all my witches Hunting fuckboys down. We’re flipping the script yeah Double, double, toil and trouble As the fire rises, blood will boil and bubble The blue moon eclipse is high, and under its light The witches are coming, they’re going hunting tonight Double, double, boil and bubble You have summoned up a coven of them, boy, you’re in trouble You can cry, you can try to hide or run underground But the witches are coming out, they’re hunting you down Liam was a movie star on the A-list Beloved by all, considered one of the greatest But on a press tour stop he pulled a sick stunt When he said the #metoo movement is a witch hunt Bitch, what? How dare you claim, these girls pain is a fallacy actually having the audacity to name this Blasphemy tragedy and savagery happened in women’s history you a bitch to me, we’re switching shit up in this century who am I, oh you insist? Bring ya dumbass here, I’ll show you how I lived tie you to this rock, piercing thru ya skin and limbs say bye to ya kids, hurl you off the sixth st bridge I am tired of this shit, double boil and bubble y’all have summoned a bunch of us, mother fuckas in trouble I swear y’all talk mad with no consequence let’s see how bad y’all get, facing the wrath of a witch Double, double, toil and trouble As the fire rises, blood will boil and bubble The blue moon eclipse is high, and under its light The witches are coming, they’re going hunting tonight Double, double, boil and bubble You have summoned up a coven of them, boy, you’re in trouble You can cry, you can try to hide or run underground But the witches are coming out, they’re hunting you down Donnie was the CEO of America Beleaguered by scandals, he’d just deny and disparage them With each day’s bombshell, he’d whip up A tweet to save face with his base and blame a witch hunt Bitch, what? American citizens gather around your disgrace of a POTUS Camera lenses from every state put his face into focus And witness a witch’s way to serve him his fate I bet the ratings will be great as he's burned at the stake We got the flames to roast him hotter than the correspondent’s dinner If you thought his skin was thin? It's about to get thinner So gather up the kindling, ring around the rosie, he’s in high demand Tie a whole lot of rope around his tiny hands The imminent incineration will be instrumental in proving his innocence But if he’s a sinner the tinder will immolate him like they do in Leviticus Listen to the sizzle we’re crisping the skin of the pig as we set him ablaze And take with him ALL religious extremists and bigots, making America great Double, double, toil and trouble As the fire rises, blood will boil and bubble The blue moon eclipse is high, and under its light The witches are coming, they’re going hunting tonight Double, double, boil and bubble You have summoned up a coven of them, boy, you’re in trouble You can cry, you can try to hide or run underground But the witches are coming out, they’re hunting you down
9.
Step in to the garden, we're gonna lock the gate We gotta keep out the sinners, gotta keep out the hate Look at the horizon, the time is coming near Look out at the world on fire, look at the people frozen in fear Revelation 21:7 The Alpha and Omega, the beginning and ending O holy blessing, let us prep for Armageddon I am the Father, shepherding my children into heaven YES! I started with a vision, and then came the rest I’m like a more charismatic David Koresh There are others here like you, lost but they got found Locked down upon a Montana compound Let the heretics march in the streets We’ll be sovereign, self-governed, armed to the teeth When the judgment comes down and takes the heathens We’ll be standing righteous at the Gates of Eden And then before the choir, harken the creed I said that every forest fire starts with a Seed Amen now take the blade and carve your sin in your skin And wash away, let your let atonement begin It’s like pride, wrath, envy, lust Sloth, greed, gluttony, trust That when they learn that it’s too late, they’ll come for us, breaking But God will not let them take me We won't listen to their crying They had their chance to see the light All of this I saw in ashes and frozen For all of this, I didn’t ask, I was chosen We won't be handing out no pardons 'Cause the world is gonna end tonight Something is coming, you can feel it, can’t you? That’s the reckoning the angels have been screaming at you The signs you haven’t seen have shown us that it’s started Your kind has brought depravity, the locusts in our garden Hardened skeptics will say I’m insane and call us a cult Their own homes in disarray, they’ll scoff and insult But we will exult for these are tests we must face I’ve lost brothers and sons, more than once I’ve lost Faith But God spoke to me, a nobody from nowhere with nothing He taketh a child, warned us the sinners are hunting That they will come for our weapons, that they will come with a rope That they will come for our freedom, but they will never take Hope And I heard as it were the noise of thunder A cleansing by fire, entire world torn asunder Under sirens and wolves and baptists called in for curfew We’ll be reborn into a new dawn of virtue It’s like chastity, charity, diligence, patience Temperance, humility, kindness, statements Will be reiterated as the ground begins shaking That God will not let them take me We won't listen to their screaming They had their chance to do what's right The falling crimson sky will crash in the ocean For all of this, I didn’t ask, I was chosen They'll be begging for forgiveness 'Cause the world is gonna end tonight Testify, my child How sweet the sound of my father’s voice Made the move up north to Montana by choice An English professor with tenure denied Because I taught Huck Finn against a stark racial divide When a student complained I was fired for a quote Taken out of context, faculty took a vote And I was out on the street with a worthless degree That’s when I read about this place of unity and peace Where I could finally see bliss existing past the veil I left a world of phonies, Holden Caulfield had set sail How could I be a teacher when the past had been rewritten? That’s when I saw the statue in the moonlight, I was smitten Because what if he’s right? Doesn’t that make you think? Everyone’s a little crazy, and the world’s on the brink Of destruction and flames, but Gatsby’s glad that I’m here Eden’s Gate open up, healing me and fears - no more War, famine, pestilence, death The martyrs will trumpet the cataclysmic events And when it’s just us left, you’ll know that I wasn’t faking ‘Cause God will not even take me We won't listen to your begging You had your chance to stand and fight Where once were seven seals, the last of them’s broken For all of this, I didn’t ask, I was frozen And now you'll end your days in darkness 'Cause the world is gonna end tonight
10.
Yo, you got a problem? I got some, lots of ‘em Everywhere I look, I’m crawling with ‘em, rotten ones Bottom rung dwellers want a bare knuckle catfight They got skeletons and belt buckles, that’s right Here they come, bum bum hits the kick drum Wicked like the pictures, get your stun gun, dum dum I’m done, son, better boost up the pace They got me cruising through space, they got me losing my faith They got me right where they want me, and they’re coming in hot Gotta slip a little distance in, get under their shots I brought a bat to a cannon battle, run to the spot And hold up inside and pack up my pride and cry “mother of god!” Rocking a hate-based rage making it up to the top Feel like my eyeballs’ll burst, my eardrums gonna pop I got my talons out, calling like a bald eagle I got seven billion problems, and they’re all people I hate people, I hate people, they’re evil At their best, they’re bad, at their worst, they’re lethal Lost all hope, past the end of my rope I’m just a misanthrope, and I can’t cope, people I hate people, see, all people equally Just a plague upon a planet we inhabit needlessly It’s too late for me to wait for what the future brings I’ve seen the human beings ruin things Where do I start with the topic at hand? Homo sapiens congregate and I can’t stand How they breathe, how they travel, make my sanity unravel Yeah, it’s baffling, the fuckery I grapple with All the patience that I wasn’t more possessing And who is this ho that I should be impressing? Let me be clear, they a cluster of fucks Invites to bullshit I constantly duck, bitch I hate your selfie and the bougie kale you eat Y’all a boring sack of shit the devil excretes Folks are all cunts and everybody wants to front Like they’re living it up, but it’s a corny ass stunt People I hate most are the ones who be entitled To other folks’ blessings like their presence is delightful Why you gotta kick it with the people I don’t like? Motherfuckers like to make me wanna do a hunger strike I hate people, I hate people, they’re evil At their best, they’re bad, at their worst, they’re lethal Lost all hope, past the end of my rope I’m just a misanthrope, and I can’t cope, people I hate people, see, all people equally Just a plague upon a planet we inhabit needlessly It’s too late for me to wait for what the future brings I’ve seen the human beings ruin things All of the sexist and the racist and deluded White dudes who think that criticism equals persecution Fuck the All Lives Matter crowd, feed ‘em to the fishes With the sickening Christians calling their bigotry freedom of religion The pious with their bias-backing stats they cite as facts And the bros in feminist clothes who don’t get claps, then attack The sexual predators, circling sharks who depend Upon the support of the chickenshit rape apologists they call friends Like that pretentious artist fuck who fights that man is better And that no-talent hack who still bites the hands that fed her The guy who wanted me working for free and talked shit when I didn’t And all of the kids who say that I suck who’ve been in my scene for like minutes Those who have the power to resist, but wouldn’t dare And the child in the White House and those who put him there I’m over ‘em, fed up, I’m had enough of their stay And if you’re with me, put a hand up, now go the fuck away I hate people, I hate people, they’re evil At their best, they’re bad, at their worst, they’re lethal Lost all hope, past the end of my rope I’m just a misanthrope, and I can’t cope, people I hate people, see, all people equally Just a plague upon a planet we inhabit needlessly It’s too late for me to wait for what the future brings I’ve seen the human beings ruin things Now fuck off

about

The Department of Darkness is a collaborative project involving producer Vince Vandal, rapper Schaffer the Darklord and several guest vocalists. The project’s self-titled debut album was released on October 1st, 2018.

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released October 1, 2018

Vince Vandal: instrumentals and mixes
Schaffer the Darklord: lyrics and album artwork
Featuring: Ohm-I, Coolzey, Francine, Mikal kHill, Mega Ran, MC Frontalot, Miss Eaves, LadyJ, Lex the Lexicon Artist, MC Lars and Shubzilla

Mastered by Cecil Decker

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Schaffer the Darklord

Schaffer the Darklord (or STD) is a New York City-based rapper and comedian with material best-suited for brainy and/or drug- addled audiences. With manic energy, verbose vocabulary and cartoonishly commanding stage presence, STD skewers such topics as hedonistic substance abuse, sexual compulsion, urban anxiety and obsessive cat-enthusiasts. ... more

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